Feature Interview – Lady Lila Stern: DommeAddiction.com

I am Lady Lila Stern your Fem Dom Sadistic Venus in Furs Goddess. I am a Professional and Lifestyle Domina in Los Angeles and traveling…

If you have found yourself here…I would assume there’s a very good reason and you most likely belong here…belong with me…in my space…so I can take you to your sub space where you belong…

I have been enticed by BDSM and fantasy play since my youth… punishing boyfriends for my pleasure and exploring kinky desires. I am from the Boston area originally and grew up in a very open minded home. I have always been a very creative woman with a lot of attitude and a very dark sense of humor. I think you will especially enjoy that. I greatly enjoy fetish play and love hearing about all your fantasies. I may even indulge them if it sounds like something that will amuse me.

I love playing dress up and have a large collection of lingerie…heels…costumes and wigs… If you’re lucky I will entertain your darkest desires.. I adore role play…Whether I am your Naughty Nurse maid…Your angry Teacher who takes you over the knee…..The mother you desire to tell you what is right and wrong…maybe you are a lost little puppy who needs training…

I also adore sissy play and feminization. I love turning men into the nasty little girls they so greatly desire to be. I have a passion in this area. My heart opens up when men feel the desire to cross dress or be women…I love being part of this transformation. Dressing you up and making you the beautiful woman you are thrills me…I think my interest has also to do with how much I love being a woman and all the things that come with it…I know you are going to love it too…all of it. I will eat your heart out. I will ruin you…you will feel a feeling you have never felt before…

slaveboysmith: For any who follow you, it is very evident you control men with ease.  Has that always been the case? Do you recall when you first realized the power you hold over men

Lady Lila Stern: So nice of you to notice! It has yes! I have very early memories of tying up boys! There was this neighborhood boy, a little older then me who was always trying to do/say pervy things. One day my girl friend and I had enough and seduced him into taking his clothes off and then tied him up to a swing set and left him there for his parents to find. After that there was a slew of makeup wearing heartbroken bfs from ages 13-17.

sbs: Are you naturally dominant in every aspect of your life, or is Femdom more a roleplay for you when interacting with slaves? 

LLS: Definitely  not a role-play… I find that when you do this for many years as a profession it leaks into all aspects of your life which has always been fine by me. While I do book sessions I would say most of my subs and slaves have been with me many years and it’s due to my enjoyment of long term D/s relationships and…my love for controlling men. I don’t think you can fake that.

sbs: If you could have one celebrity, or well known person, completely at your mercy, willing to do anything you demanded of them, who would it be, and why?

LLS: As much as I want to say someone handsome and sexy, I feel like being a do-gooder so let’s say Donald Trump. I am not into talking politics but let’s just say someone could use an attitude adjustment and I would love to help out with that.

sbs: Is there a specific type of slave you find is drawn to you? Can all submissive men be persuaded to slip across that line into financial domination?

LLS: YES and YES. I would say that due to being a Pro Domme, to start… has something to do with this but all slaves and subs should WANT to contribute to their Mistress’ well being. Most of the subs I meet through sessions and when I find someone I enjoy who wants to serve more then just a session they are of course expected to contribute to my lifestyle consistently even outside of session. Most want to, I don’t consider myself to be a Findom necessarily but my slaves WANT me to have the best, even if that means sacrifice on their part.

I definitely attract a certain kind of slave. I find upscale sophisticated men (or women) who are usually a bit more traditionally attracted to Femdom and are looking for a little more in depth servitude and a deeper connection are drawn to me. Also that share my love of Leather, Fur and of course sissification.


sbs: Do you prefer to break and enslave men who might resist, or use well-trained ones that are already broken in?

LLS: 
I do not enjoy resistant subs. I only want those who want to serve me and enjoy it. They don’t need to be well trained, just resilient, polite and ready to be trained by ME. Every Domme has a different style. While some basic etiquette is nice it’s not necessary that they are thoroughly trained before they find themselves at my feet. 

sbs: Beyond financial domination, which is an obvious favorite of many Dommes, do you have other specific fetishes you enjoy exploring with your slaves?

LLS: Sissification has been a long time love. I love making men over to be women. Aside from that I love Ballbusting, Foot Worship, High heel And Stocking worship, leather and latex, fur and gloves.

sbs: Can you describe the feeling you have when you have control of a slave, desperately doing whatever it takes to please you? Is it a rush, or just an expected outcome you’ve grown used to?

LLS: YES, I am definitely used to it. Seems natural really to have control…but there is always a chance that doing a certain scene will give me that feeling of excitement…and I always love controlling my slaves whether I am used to it or not.

sbs: How can you tell when you’ve completely broken someone and they are unable to resist you?  Is there a “tell” of some kind that lets you know you’ve taken total control?

LLS: Usually there is a bit of a feverish thing that happens in the beginning when you really have someone under your thumb and then periodically…for the rest of their lives…haha. Seriously though.

sbs: Have you ever been recognized in public? If so, how does the slave react to seeing his ultimate Goddess in person?

LLS: Not by a stranger. I have run into subs I know in public places but they have always been respectful and discreet and only reached out after to say something. Discretion in public is important. At fetish events, yes, and usually very humbly and polite but that is a different thing. 

sbs: For slaves looking to impress you, what is the best way for them to show you they are sincere in their desire to serve and spoil?

LLS: For new subs …Read my website. Fill out my submission form, send a gift before session and /or bring one. Even something small and thoughtful is fine. Obviously I love luxury items but a gift within your budget is still appreciated. Slaves I already know… get to know me, take LITERAL notes. Do helpful things to help me in my everyday life. ASK ME BEFORE I ASK YOU! (Mistress, would you like your coffee today?) Remember a slaves job is to make my life easier and more luxurious.

sbs: Is there anything else you would like to tell your admiring worshipers reading this interview?

LLS: 
I am new to making content so please checkout my iWantClips and Clips4sale stores. I also LOVE making custom clips.

sbs: If you would oblige me one final question…if we were conducting this interview in person, me kneeling before you, how would it end?

LLS: It wouldn’t end…it would NEVER end..you would be ADDICTED!

 
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Re-printed from DommeAddiction.com.

How to Make It as a Dominatrix: Vice.com

Lady Lila Stern is one of Los Angeles’s fastest rising dominatrixes. When Mike Kulich from Skweezme.com told me about Stern, he described her as “a nice, Jewish, New England girl who rose the ranks to become one of the top pro-dominatrixes in LA.”

A nice, Jewish dominatrix may sound like an oxymoron, but Stern fits the bill. Two years ago, she launched her career when she was just another floundering actress struggling to pay her bills. Looking to find ways to earn extra money, she started working in the sex industry because domming fit her strong personality. Soon she was screwing with guys as a full-time job.

Since then Stern has discovered the perks of her job. Unlike Hollywood actresses who aren’t named Meryl Streep, dominatrixes can see their careers get bigger as they age and become more experienced. Stern’s occupation has also allowed her to find her “inner domme” and transform from a kinky, submissive New Englander into a dominant superwoman. As an ode to her budding career, Stern recently got a large tattoo of a mermaid holding a human heart. “People see the heart and tell me, ‘You know she’s under the water,’” she said. “I don’t give a fuck where she is!”

Interested in learning more about Stern’s work, I met with her last month to discuss her clients, sex work’s perks, and how to make it as a dominatrix in Hollywood.

VICE: How did you become a successful dominatrix?
Lady Lila Stern: They have these parties, and you go to three or four parties. It was pretty crazy to be honest, because even though I had a lot of experience in my personal life, it is a lot different—these people are strangers. That’s why we have clients that stay such a long time. It’s kind of incredible; you can build such an intense relationship.

What do the majority of your clients come to you for?
I do have clients who are into fetish as well as slaves. It’s a pretty good mix of both.

What’s the difference?
They are very different clients. A guy that comes to me for a foot-fetish session doesn’t necessarily want to be degraded and told what a tiny penis he has. Slaves are a little easier to deal with because they’re more submissive. More recently there’s been an emergence of sensual domming, which is like foot fetishes and smothering—things like that I get a lot of calls for.

Why has your clientele changed?
It’s hard for me to say because I’ve only been pro-domming for two years, but honestly I think it’s probably [a good thing]. I think it’s happening because a lot more people are open. You know there was that whole 50 Shades of Grey—a very tame version of S&M, but I’m not completely against the book. I think it opened up a lot of people who were afraid to go there [to see a dominatrix] because they thought they’d beat the crap out of you and yell at you, and that’s obviously not what domming is.

How has working as a dominatrix changed your personal life?
I’ve met so many powerful, amazing women that have become my world. Relationships can be funny, but it’s translated into my personal life amazingly—it’s made me feel so powerful and strong. Relationships are a little tough. When I started domming, I was in a relationship for a number of years with a guy who was heavily into kink. At first it was awesome, but then it got hard as he got a little jealous. I’ve just realized that I’m going to have to be with a very strong man. Most of the dommes I know are lesbians, or at least have a strong preference for women. What’s strange about me is that I am attracted to men who are dominant in their lives. I like to think that anyone who isn’t okay with what I do isn’t the right person for me, or as my mother says, “You sure don’t make it easy on yourself.”

What about the job appeals to you?
I make people’s fantasies a reality. It makes me feel like I’m helping people. Pro-dommes are obviously around for a reason. You’re providing a service for people—a lot of who have wives or girlfriends, who either are afraid or [in the past] they told [people about their fetish] and they were shunned [becuase of] it—so it feels really good to let people feel some satisfaction and feel fulfilled. I met some people in the industry who helped me find my inner-domme.

How did that affect you?
That’s when I fell in love with it, because I knew it was in me—but it was a strange thing when I started because I don’t naturally get off on hurting people. It feels very intense, and sexy, and real. I’m myself doing what I do; it brings out a power that I didn’t even know I had. Domming has changed my whole life. I have never been happier in my whole life. I get to wake up every day and be kinky. That’s pretty awesome.

Follow Sophie Saint Thomas on Twitter.

Re-printed from Vice.com.

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